STOP THE LIES: "It's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change"

We've all heard this one before, from just about every new fad diet on the market.

"No, really! This is NOT a diet. It's a lifestyle change/way of life/new mentality/fresh start/bla bla bla..."

Come on, now.

If it comes with a meal plan, and has any sort of weight loss goal associated with it, it's a diet.

Now- let's distinguish a bit here, because 'diet' is a tricky word.

There is "YOUR" diet- the food that you (and every other 'you' in the world) eats. Your diet may or may not have a meal plan, weight loss goals, nutrition goals, or be comprised of foods haphazardly tossed on your plate. Every person has their own diet- the intake of food that they engage in.

But, for the past fifty years or so, the fitness and weight loss industry has hijacked the word 'diet' and distorted it pretty seriously. So now, we must content with "a diet", which is significantly different that 'your diet'.

'A diet' generally implies caloric restriction for the purpose of reducing body weight. And there are TONS out there on the market.

But, people have gotten fatigued from this word "diet". They aren't interested in being sold a plan that feels shameful, restrictive, and- often- unhealthy.

So the fitness and weightloss industry adapts. And, in doing so, continues to appropriate terms as needed and completely distort their meaning.

The newest one is 'lifestyle', which might disguise itself with other similar types of euphemisms. But they all come down to the same thing: We don't want you to think that we are a 'diet'- because diets aren't things you want to buy anymore. So instead, we want to sell you a 'lifestyle'- because it not only sounds better, but it implies to you that you will need us...for the rest of your life!"

Double win for the industry.
Double lose for you.

Because, here's the thing. It's a lie...again.

The vast majority of programs that are touting these major new lifestyle changes are fully unsustainable in the long run, do nothing to help you plan for maintenance mode or to transition away from them, and do very little more than creating disordered eating patterns that take you about as far away from a natural food lifestyle as humanly possible.

You see, while eating a specific way (whatever that way might be) can be part of your lifestyle, following a specific meal plan is very rarely sustainable in long term situations. People don't live thirty or fifty years carrying food containers, special shake packets, microwave meals, or food journals around with them. Sometimes, restaurants happen. Sometimes, you eat over at a friend's house. Sometimes, you have a hankering for things that aren't on your plan.

So then we "cheat" (a term that I loathe, and will write more on later...trust me, I've got a list going.). And then we relapse. And then we need to start over, this time with a new diet 'lifestyle' plan.

Same goes for the fitness program. 30 minutes a day of the same dvds...indefinitely? Likely not going to happen. Variety is the spice of life, and pretty much the only way to ensure that your 'active lifstyle' doesn't wind up being a fleeting phase is by adding physical activity into your days in a variety of different ways. Your body is built to adapt, grow and evolve, and your fitness/exercise/activity routines must do the same.

So, a 'lifestyle change' that you can't actually sustain for the rest of your life...well, it's not a lifestyle change at all, now is it?

Now, have some people experienced transformative lifestyle changes using some of these programs as starting off points? Sure. You're reading from one of them.

But it wasn't the actual program that gave me that change. In fact, the more my lifestyle changed, the more I realized how incredibly problematic the programs I had been using really were. I hadn't been actually 'taught' anything about food, proper nutrition, muscles or cardiovascular needs...I actually didn't know ANYTHING except how to follow that program.  Beyond that, I was continuously subjecting myself to messaging that shamed my body and implied that I was not/would never be good enough- that I had to work harder, and constantly strive to be thinner/stronger/sexier/more appealing.

It was a head trip.

So once I was done with the program, or got bored, or found it didn't work for me, I would just quit.
My psyche was done taking a beating, and I needed to walk away in order to recover from the shame and disappointment that comes with being 'unsuccessful' and not seeing 'results'.

The programs were actually part of the cycle that was preventing me from getting into a sustainable lifestyle of health and wellness.

So, how does one actually make real lifestyle changes?

Well, it's actually pretty simple, even if it is easier said than done. The body of evidence indicates that long-term lifestyle changes are most successful when they:

a) Follow a plan that is personalized and tailored to your own goals (none of this mass market, 'we should all do the exact same thing and look the exact same way' bs) 

b) Are focused on making small, short-term progressive changes in manageable doses that all point towards specific long term goals.  

c) Focus on changing on behaviour at a time, only adding in more changes when the first has become part of the daily routine.  

d) Involve an active support network of people who are engaged in seeing you succeed, who care about you personally and have a socio-emotional relationship with you and are prepared to actively support you in your goals. (Again, we're not talking about someone who is only Facebook friends with you in order to sell you something.) 

Many different diet/fitness plans have some of these elements- but most are missing at least one or two critical components. Some  are trying to change too much, too fast while others are are too hyperfocused on long term goals, and make promises that are literally unachievable in the short term. Some use support groups, but sully these by creating a power dynamic by which pressure selling and false advertising/product claims are the foundation for the relationship. Others leave you hanging in the wind to fend for yourself when the going gets tough.

This doesn't mean that you should throw out every system out there! It just means that you need to be vigilent of what the real limitations are the systems and programs that you are using, and make sure that you find ways to fill in the missing gaps yourself.

Create goals, both long term and short term. Focus your attention on things that are in your control to change, and on making small, meaningful changes.

And enjoy the journey of self-betterment, whatever that might look like for you.

You deserve to be happy in the skin you are in, right now- in this moment.

The most important lifestyle change you can make is learning to love, respect, accept, forgive and celebrate yourself.